💌 Dear Mamajee,
It’s been a year since you were gone. How am I supposed to feel? Well, before this, I know I felt sad. No, more than sad. I was heartbroken. Confused. Speechless. I couldn’t think straight. I felt like looking up to the sky and screaming.
But at the same time, I couldn’t make a sound. In the days leading up until now, honestly, I was anxious. What would it be like, knowing that it would have been a year since you left us? How would I feel now when before this, I felt like I couldn’t live without you? Would I always be in grief? Would I forget you completely?
Yet here I am, one year later, loving you and remembering you. So what’s the answer to that very first question? How am I supposed to feel? It’s simple – I feel relieved. Relieved that I have made it this far. Relieved that you still live on in our hearts. Relieved that I still have so much to be grateful for – the loving, supporting family I have around me, and the memories in which I can still find you.
And after all, while we may not be able to talk to you, we know that you’re waiting for us all to be reunited again. All I pray for is that Allah accepts my special gift to you in this holy month of Ramadhan.
19th May 2020